WASHINGTON, D.C. - Congressmembers - who just finished voting to legalize the dismemberment and murder of babies through all 9 months of pregnancy - were shocked last night when Congresswoman Lauren Boebert loudly interrupted Biden's State of the Union address. Many Democrats - who are cool with stabbing babies in the back of the neck with scissors before sucking out their brains - condemned Boebert's display as "highly uncivil."
"Boebert's shameful display was quite irregular, most improper, and highly reprehensible," said a shuddering Nancy Pelosi, who doesn't see a problem with burning unborn babies alive with saline solution. "It was also unbecoming and most unladylike. SHAME!"
Dozens of Democrats joined the chorus of criticism and called for civility and decorum to be returned to the halls of Congress.
"Our nation's Capitol is a hallowed place, where the sacred work of democracy is done," said one Democrat congressman who sexually assaults interns on a regular basis and has paid for 12 abortions himself. "Lauren Boebert has stained this place with her... her... IMPROPRIETY!"
Democrats have called for Boebert to be censured until she learns her place as a woman in Congress - or at least stops opposing them on abortion.
Michael Simmons' doctor tells him he's obese and needs to lose some weight - but the patient has the perfect comeback: he's pregnant!