Church Deploys Drones To Make Sure Worshipers Sit, Stand, Raise Hands When Instructed
Church

VALLEY VIEW, WA—Grace Church of the Foothills released a fleet of surveillance drones Sunday morning to make sure families worshiping at home were sitting, standing, and raising hands when they were instructed to.

Pastors and worship leaders are still telling their congregations worshiping remotely to stand, sit, raise their hands, clap their hands, and greet their neighbors. But they had no way to verify that: a problem now addressed by this innovative congregation. The church also found that they were able to verify that everyone was both wearing their Sunday best and taking attentive sermon notes.

"Let's all raise our hands together, church!" shouted worship leader Jim "Headbang" Mollison. Then, the tech team checked the footage coming back from the drones to make sure everyone was doing it.

"Looks like the Johnsons aren't raising their hands in Sector 4," tech guy Wayne Peterson muttered. "Deploy countermeasures." The drone then fired a warning shot into the air, causing the Johnsons to scramble to raise their hands as instructed. "That's right. Dance, monkeys, dance!"

Catholic churches in particular may benefit from this new method as they tell you to stand and sit an average of 4,273 times per service.

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