MILWAUKEE, WI — In one of the greatest deceptions known to mankind, a child who spent her entire nap looking like a perfect little angel while asleep transformed into a demonic hellion immediately upon waking up.
According to Melissa Stevens, the child's mom, her newborn daughter, Tracy, spent two and a half hours looking cherubic, mild, and entirely perfect before waking up in an inferno-fueled tizzy of demonic wrath.
"The transformation happened in the blink of an eye," Stevens recalled, shuddering. "Tracy opened her eyes and stared directly at me without changing expression for seven seconds, then opened her mouth and immediately began screaming for thirty minutes without once drawing breath. It honestly would have been a little impressive if I hadn't had to be there for it."
Sources within the family's home said that Tracy only paused her screaming for a brief period to eat, burp cutely, and fill her diaper with poop before descending back into her hellish rage.
At publishing time, the baby had once again metamorphosed into a sweet angel of light after getting tired and falling asleep in her mother's arms.
Heartwarming!
