Prayer is among the most powerful tools Christians have, yet like a sad houseplant, it's often neglected. That's why we consulted with the world's most faithful and holy Christians to learn the best tips to maintaining a healthy prayer life. Check them out below.
Surefire ways to improve your prayer life today:
Start slowly by praying at least once a year: You gotta walk before you can run.
Whenever you pray, reward yourself with a Nerds Gummy Cluster: Science has found these to be one of nature's strongest incentives.
Remember to address God in His native King James English: Praying in New American Standard will not get your prayers answered.
Do NOT pray to anything with horns: This is a classic mistake.
Have your phone next to you at all times and turn on all your notifications so you can receive news updates from social media about important issues you can pray for: Very helpful.
Make sure your hands are folded, as this boosts your prayer signal like an antenna: A proven strategy.
Pay someone to ask you every day if you prayed that morning, and if you didn't, they slap you in the face: Your wife might do this for free.
If you're unsure what to pray, try some Megadeth lyrics: Those are usually pretty theologically accurate.
Say "Father God" as often as possible: It's like a multiplier that makes your prayer much more effective.
If you're busy, ask ChatGPT to pray for you: The future is here!
Say "amen" at the end, so God knows when to stop listening: It's the polite thing to do.
Heartwarming!
