President Donald Trump's administration finally got settled into the White House this week, but word has it that cleaning the place out after Joe Biden's departure was a daunting task. Trump's team worked long hours following the inauguration, and you won't believe what they found.
The Babylon Bee's Washington, D.C. connections provided the following list of things found by Trump's staff when cleaning out the White House:
74 bags of a white, powdery substance: Test results were still pending to identify the substance, but… you know what it was.
Several leftover cases of adult diapers: As any parent knows, nothing is worse than finding out you're out of diapers.
Chair lift: Determined to be obsolete now that there's a president who can navigate stairs.
One Resolute Desk drawer filled with nothing but ice cream cones: Presidents always keep their most important and frequently needed supplies close by.
A discarded copy of the U.S. Constitution crumpled up under a couch: Clearly, nobody had found any use for it and forgot it was there.
Cash-filled envelope labeled "For Zelensky": Ope! One last payment still needed to be sent.
Numerous posters pinned up in the hallways saying "Your name is Joe, the year is 2024, and you are the President of the United States": No word yet on who these signs were for.
Complete DVD sets of Matlock, Murder She Wrote, and Dog with a Blog: Reportedly used to keep Biden occupied for hours in the Situation Room.
Gold copy of Half Life 3 Joe had been keeping from the world this whole time: Now everyone knows who to blame.
11,000 Georgia ballots marked for Trump from the 2020 election: Yikes… maybe these were important?
As of yet, there had been no confirmed reports of the crew finding any sign of the White House ghost Biden was always shaking hands with. What else do you think they found? Post your ideas in the comments.
We're prophets here at The Babylon Bee. So for your benefit, we put together these 100% accurate predictions for 2025.
