GYEONGJU — Trade negotiations between the U.S. and China reached a much-needed breakthrough on Thursday, as Chinese President Xi Jinping agreed to drop all tariffs after President Donald Trump showed him how to use chopsticks to become a walrus.
The two heads of state came face-to-face at a high-stakes summit in South Korea to iron out the ongoing friction between the world's two largest economic powers. Insiders said the conversation remained tense until Trump showed Xi that he could turn himself into a walrus by using chopsticks as tusks.
"It's a great trick, everyone says so," Trump was overheard telling the Chinese leader. "I learned it back in the late 90s. I had dinner with Jackie Chan. Great guy. Lots of movies. Great with the martial arts. He showed me how to use chopsticks to become a walrus. I've never forgotten it. It's a much better use of the chopsticks, believe me. I don't like to eat with them. I'm much better with a fork. But when it comes to being a walrus, chopsticks are the way to go. Give it a try."
After successfully using his chopsticks to turn into a walrus, Xi agreed to move forward with efforts to build a strong trade agreement between the nations. "This will be a moment remembered throughout history," he reportedly told Trump. "I never imagined I could use a pair of chopsticks to become a walrus. There are many things our cultures can learn from each other. Let this be the beginning of a strong and fruitful relationship."
At publishing time, Xi had reportedly returned the favor by agreeing to print all of Trump's Truth Social posts on little slips of paper placed inside of fortune cookies.
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