MUSTAFAR — The Galactic Empire was forced into damage control mode this week after it was revealed that Darth Vader had realized that he had mistakenly added Rebel Alliance leader Admiral Ackbar to a holochat about planning the Alderaan bombing.
The gaffe was discovered over the weekend when anonymous sources told Holonet News that Rebel forces had become aware of details surrounding the bombing of Alderaan, with the intelligence being traced back to a group holochat belonging to Vader, Emperor Palpatine, and other Imperial officials. The Dark Lord of the Sith gave an official statement about the incident.
"One of the rebels was unintentionally included in a private holochat," Vader said. "It was one of their high-ranking officers. The lobster-looking one with the weird fish eyes. We should've noticed. Anyway, we were discussing an Imperial operation, but no ‘war plans' were discussed, and no classified materials were sent on the channel. I don't know who let the crustacean rebel into the chat, but when they are identified, I will deal with them myself. Also, any reports about us discussing placing bets on next week's podraces are completely false."
Outspoken critics of the Empire pointed to the incident as yet another example of incompetence. "How are they supposed to keep us all safe if they can't even keep their high-level communications secure?" asked concerned Imperial citizen Jax Mordan. "If the Emperor and Lord Vader aren't careful about who is included in private holochats, then it's only a matter of time before their irresponsibility ends up — ERRCK!"
At publishing time, it had been reported that Jax Mordan and his disturbing insolence had been "dealt with" by Darth Vader.
The Founding Fathers didn't always agree behind closed doors.
