WASHINGTON, D.C. - During an International Women's Day protest Friday, local woman Jenny Martin declared, "We must resist Trump!" even though her life hasn't changed in the slightest since Trump was elected.

"We cannot let this become the new norm!" shouted the woman whose life was just about the same as it was under Obama.

"Hate is the new norm, and we can't stand for this!" she cried, though she'd not personally witnessed any acts of extreme hate during Trump's time in office. "Women, we must band together to resist this regime that has totally devastated all of womankind by not really changing our lives much at all!"

She pointed out that Trump's "reign of terror" has included horrible oppression for women, such as better and more frequent employment opportunities, higher wages, and a stronger economy. "Trump is literally oppressing all of us by making us more prosperous and privileged, turning us into the very thing we hate!"

"Resist! Resist!" she chanted through a megaphone.

At publishing time, Martin had reluctantly confirmed that her life had in fact gotten marginally better over the past two years