WASHINGTON, D.C. - By all accounts, President Donald Trump has now gone completely mad with power. In a press briefing, he laid out his insidious plan.
"When I'm done with this country, everyone will be able to leave their houses whenever they want and do whatever they want," Trump told the press with an evil grin. "They'll be able to peaceably assemble in whatever size groups they desire! Muhahaha!"
"You're a mad man!" a CNN reporter cried. "You don't have the power to let people have freedom! You're a tyrant!"
"My power is absolute!" Trump screamed. "No one can stop me! Soon everyone will be able to go back to work and buy whatever they feel like from the store even if bureaucrats don't like it!"
"Noooo!" cried an MSNBC reporter. "You have to arrest people who don't do what the government tells them! Who do you think you are? Someone stop him!"
But no one came to stop him, and Trump just laughed an evil laugh.
It is unknown if anything can be done about Trump, but many hope that the Constitution has enough checks and balances to keep one man from giving out freedom by fiat.