Tyrannical Fascist Governor Orders Citizens To Do Whatever They Want
Politics · Feb 9, 2022 · BabylonBee.com

RICHMOND, VA - Virginia Governor Glenn Youngkin, a known tyrant, has ordered his citizens to do whatever they want when it comes to wearing masks. His fascist ideals are expected to propel the state into total chaos as people begin to make their own decisions on how to live their life this March.

Gov. Youngkin held a press conference to announce the new undemocratic policy, which follows in the jack-booted footsteps of fascist governor Ron DeSantis. 

"I think it best that Virginians do whatever they feel like doing," said the evil fascist pig who loves freedom. "People are capable of accepting personal responsibility for their own actions."

The literal Nazi then took several questions from the press, taking the time to give clear answers without evading any issues. Sources reveal many exchanges were quite heated since the Governor clearly wants to murder every man, woman, and child with his weaponized freedom.

NBC correspondent Clarice McBird asked: "Governor Youngkin, why do you want people to die?"

"I do not want people to die. Next question - "

"Sir, a follow-up!" the McBird persisted. "Why do you want to murder my grandfather?"

The murderous tyrant patiently answered McBird's questions, and other similar questions, but could provide no satisfactory answers. Because he's literally Hitler.

Democratic leadership in Washington was quick to dismiss Gov. Youngkin's sentiments, calling them "outlandish" and "un-American."

"How can we, as a modern society living in 2022, allow people to do whatever they want?" asked House Speaker Nancy Pelosi. "We will retaliate against the malevolent Virginia governorship by grandstanding night and day!"

Residents of Virginia have until the end of February to live in a safe zone with zero free will until the veil is dropped in March. Nearby Maryland is expected to take in refugees as long as they're willing to sleep on the streets of Baltimore.


BIG NEWS: We made a movie, and you can watch the trailer NOW:

Click here to find out how you can watch the movie when it releases on October 11

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now