SILVER SPRING, MD — A new study commissioned by the National Weather Service may have found a possible connection between the current heatwave and a giant flaming orb in the sky.
The mystery of what causes heatwaves has perplexed climate scientists around the world for decades. Researchers working with NASA and top American universities have recently decided to stop using complex climate models, step away from their desks, and look outside at the giant flaming orb in the sky as a possible explanation as to why things get hot in the summertime.
"That big flaming orb in the sky is really, really hot," said head climate scientist Dr. Ben Vanderwaal. "Has that always been there?"
"It is now our belief that there might be some connection between that big flaming orb and why it's so hot outside."
Scientists say that the big flaming orb sends out electromagnetic radiation, which includes blinding light, infrared radiation, and X-rays, which can travel through the vacuum of space and heat up our tiny little planet. It's that electromagnetic radiation that climate scientists now expect may cause heatwaves.
At publishing time, climate scientists around the world were busy researching how to tax the sun to prevent catastrophic climate change.
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