Worldviews
Report: People Have Been Thinking All White Men Are Terrible But It Turns Out It's Just Steve

U.S.—There has been a growing anti-racist movement against whiteness and white males, identifying them as a scourge on society and the basis for all our problems. But now many have begun to realize that there is in fact no problem with white people in general but with only one: Steve.

“Ugh, Steve,” said one person, thinking of Steve.

“I kept writing about all these awful white people,” explained anti-racist activist Ibram X. Kendi, “ones who discriminate, oppress, and can’t dance, but then I realized each time I was just thinking of Steve. I couldn’t come up with any other examples.” Kendi laughed. “I guess I was making the same mistake as racists and overgeneralizing based on race. White people aren’t the problem; just Steve.”

“Yeah, the problem isn’t whiteness; it’s Steve-ness,” said White Fragility author Robin DiAngelo, who is now updating her book and changing the title to Steve Fragility. “I can’t believe we were blaming a whole group of people when really it was just Steve. It makes me hate Steve even more. Grr! Steve!”

As for Steve, when asked about being the real problem, he didn’t say anything but made a dumb expression that just made everyone want to punch him. Steve is the worst.

Dang it, Steve!

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