Parents At Piano Recital Perk Up As Asian Kid Takes Stage
Family · May 11, 2023 · BabylonBee.com

BOUNTIFUL, UT — After enduring dozens of lackluster performances at last night's annual piano recital, local parents reportedly sat up with eager anticipation as the show's only Asian kid took the stage.

"Ah yeah, this is gonna be good," said one of the dads to his wife, according to sources. Several other dads who had been quietly checking sports stats on Twitter instinctively turned the game off and sat up straight in anticipation of what was sure to be the only really interesting performance of the night.

The Asian student was later confirmed to be 7-year-old David Chang, who has been practicing piano for 18 hours per day since he was 3 weeks old. He played a flawless rendition of Rachmaninoff's Piano Concerto No. 3 to the delight of an audience of otherwise underwhelmed adults. The performance resulted in a standing ovation that lasted 10 minutes.

Chang's parents later expressed disappointment in the boy's performance and ordered him home immediately to practice. "It was terrible! He had poor dynamics at the end of the second movement! He knows better!" Lily Chang said. "We hope he improves so his performance next year can be adequate."

Chang was followed by 8-year-old Mary Peterson poorly attempting to play "The Big Clock Boogie", effectively ending any interest parents had shown in the recital.


Kyle Mann was just minding his own business, when- BOOP! A wild Gender Fairy appeared!

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