Palestinians Distance Themselves From Imagine Dragons

GAZA — In a statement issued to all media outlets, Palestinians officially distanced themselves from popular music group Imagine Dragons following the band's recent waving of a Palestinian flag during a concert in Milan.

The Palestinian people overwhelmingly voted to make it clear to the world that they were in no way affiliated with the electropop-alt-rock band.

"It's just such a bad look for us to be associated in any way with Imagine Dragons," said Palestinian spokesman Abdullah Muhummad. "We Palestinians cannot at this time afford to face the public backlash and outrage that would come from everyone believing we're affiliated with that music group. Being seen as partners with Hamas is one thing. Imagine Dragons? That would be pretty bad from a P.R. standpoint."

Other Palestinian people interviewed said that it would be politically disastrous to support a band with a member who so often sings shirtless.

"If their music was better, maybe then we could talk about it," said Salom Habdullas. "But if we are seen as being close with that band, we're going to start alienating our true allies like Harvard students and residents of Portland."

Imagine Dragons was not available for comment, as frontman Dan Reynolds was reportedly busy having the Palestinian flag tattooed on his chest.

At publishing time, Ukraine had also preemptively distanced itself from the band and issued a public request that Imagine Dragons not wave a Ukrainian flag at any of their concerts.