U.S. — According to sources, leftist protesters around the nation remain totally unaffected by President Donald Trump's deregulation of shower heads.
While Trump announced the reversal of a Biden administration rule limiting the flow of water for showerheads, the policy change was expected to make no difference in the lives of thousands of protesters.
"Deregulation of what-heads?" protester Willow Moonbeam said when asked about Trump's showerhead deregulation. "I'm out here to talk about Donald Trump's blatant trampling of our freedoms, destruction of our economy, and poisoning of our planet, and you're asking me about something I've never heard of in my life."
Activists throughout the U.S. reported no difference being made to their lives in any way following the showerhead order.
"This means nothing to us!" shouted activist Harmony Steele. "The tyrannical fascist Trump regime can make changes to my shower head — whatever that is. It makes no difference to us and our noble fight against fascism."
At publishing time, activists also claimed to be unfazed by the potential of prices on soap, shampoo, deodorant, and other personal hygiene products going up as a result of increased global trade tariffs.
Meet Juan. He came to this country with a dream to commit crime. This is his story.
