U.S. — An upcoming live-streamed speech by former Vice President Kamala Harris will reportedly charge viewers $25 to mute her.
The speech, intended to be a scathing rebuke of President Trump, will cost $25 to watch, but will charge an additional $25 to use the mute button. And the mute button, according to sources, will only work for one minute at a time.
"That's 25 bucks every time you want to mute her," said X user Ben Natal. "This speech is going to make me bankrupt."
Harris, 60, is infamous for her lengthy and nonsensical speeches, leading even her most devout supporters to tune her out as she prattles on about outer space, school buses, and Venn diagram comparisons between the two. Now, even her most vocal supporters say they may tune out entirely. "There's no way I can afford to mute her like I want," said Oprah Winfrey, who previously endorsed her failed presidential campaign.
Staff at the Palace Hotel in San Francisco, where the speech will be delivered, have also been instructed to sell earplugs for up to $100 a pair for audience members who wish to drown out portions of her speech.
At publishing time, the Trump campaign had offered to air a competing live stream, featuring soothing white noise instead of Kamala Harris for a mere $100.
This freshman had a bright future ahead of her, but then her parents spent $250K to send her to a public university.
