KANSAS CITY, MO — A local church praise team reached a level of achievement not seen since the days of classic hymns, as a worship song written by the band leader broke new ground by having more than 7 different words.
The feat stunned the congregation during the Sunday morning service, as attendees noticed a stark departure from the standard worship fare, which typically contains no more than five different words per song that are simply repeated over and over.
"I'm not used to hearing worship songs like this," said one parishioner. "Like, the verses and the chorus actually said different things. Totally different words. My wife and I looked at each other in shock. It was crazy."
When reached for comment following the service, worship leader Ethan Gray admitted that he went above and beyond when writing the new song. "It took a lot out of me," he said. "Every ounce of creativity I could muster. I've never written a song with so many different words in it before. You'd be surprised at how hard it is to come up with those sixth and 7th words. Brutal. But the Lord deserves our best, right?"
Gray said he is now considering writing another song with as many as 10 different words, though he's not sure it can be done. "I don't even know how that would work," he admitted. "I mean, come on. Ten different words? In a single song? That's crazy talk. But, if God grants me the strength, anything is possible."
At publishing time, the church was reportedly looking into setting the bar for worship even higher by training a sound guy to know what all the little knobs on the mixing board do.
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