LOS ANGELES, CA — The entertainment industry was sent abuzz over the weekend after a guy at the Grammys kept saying "Jesus" but did not appear to be using it as a curse word.
The large audience of showbiz power players gathered at the Grammy Awards was reportedly unsure how to respond after realizing that the man standing on the stage repeatedly said "Jesus" and made references to God without any sign of being disrespectful or angry.
"It felt like he was being, like, reverential or something," said one person who was in the crowd. "We weren't sure what to do, since we're only used to hearing those names uttered in disrespectful, profane ways. He was saying them without any hint of sarcasm. Like he was actually addressing someone who is infinitely more important and powerful than anyone else. Weird."
Witnesses said the audience murmured uncomfortably, with some celebrities seen running out of the room while covering their ears. "That name! It hurts my ears!" one pop musician was said to have screamed. "Someone get security and tell them somebody is saying the name of Jesus Christ without using it as a curse word. This is Hollywood. That's not allowed here."
Others were later seen asking the man who had been using the name to tell them more about this person who made him feel so humbled, meek, and grateful.
At publishing time, the entertainment industry had collectively asked to have any mention of the name of Jesus in non-expletive form banned from future events.
Coming soon to a Democrat-controlled city near you!
