Hobby Lobby Introduces New Line Of Calvinist Home Decor
Christian Living · Oct 11, 2018 · BabylonBee.com

OKLAHOMA CITY, OK - Hobby Lobby has become a popular destination for Christians looking to decorate their homes with some encouraging Bible verses or hymn lyrics. 

But there's one market the arts and crafts retailer has failed to capture: hardcore Calvinists.

The company is looking to change that with its latest line of Calvinist home decor. The attractive pieces of wall art, made of wood, steel, or canvas, each contains an inspiring message, like Jonathan Edwards' famous quote, "You contribute nothing to your salvation except the sin that made it necessary," or Chuck Spurgeon: "Calvinism is the gospel, and nothing else."

Bible verses are plentiful on the gorgeous art pieces as well, from passages proclaiming that the Lord has designated some as vessels of His mercy and others as vessels of His wrath to a small wooden plank containing the entirety of Ephesians chapter 1.

"We know you Calvinist types aren't really big on the square canvases with a quote from a Hillsong tune," said Hobby Lobby CEO David Green. "So we wanted to offer you some art that's a little more wrath-filled. They'll go perfectly in your kitchen, living room, or bathroom - nothing enhances a trip to the john like a little reading from Romans 9."

The wall art is available for around $19.99 each "if you're foolish enough to buy them when they're not on the half-off special."

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