NEW YORK, NY — As the race for mayor of New York intensified, one prominent candidate landed the support of another popular Democrat, as a fake Indian made a public endorsement of a real Indian.
Fake American Indian Elizabeth Warren made a public appearance in the Big Apple on Monday to offer he approval and support to New York City mayoral candidate and real Indian Indian Zohran Mamdani.
"As a pretend Indian, I am honored to endorse a for real one," Warren told reporters. "I've watched what capitalist Republicans have done to New York. Just seeing all of the litter brings a tear to my eye. We met today to talk about the issues facing Americans, the best ways to use radical, socialist policies to address them, and we also smokem peace pipe. I completely and thoroughly offer my support to Zohran Mamdani. A real Indian."
Mamdani was honored by the historic union of fake and real Indians. "I appreciate the real endorsement of this fake Indian lady," he said. "The problems in our society aren't limited to either fake Native Americans or real foreigners pretending to be Americans to get elected to office. We have to come together — real Indians and fake Indians — to find solutions to these problems. Socialist solutions, preferably."
Sources within Mamdani's campaign said that the prospective mayor hoped to secure Warren's services to perform ceremonial rain dances to provide regular rainfall for New York.
At publishing time, reports had surfaced that Mamdani had won Warren's endorsement after offering her permanent reservations at all popular NYC restaurants.
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