SAN FRANCISCO, CA — This week, a listing appeared on the classified advertising website Craigslist offering to sell a "lightly used" social network for "$5 OBO." The listing included a picture of Twitter's HQ in San Francisco.

"Excellent condition, very low bot count. Interior cleaned recently, includes recently restored free speech," begins the listing before adding "do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers." The listing went on to explain the social network's well-preserved state, detailing the recent work done to improve its quality by removing old, unneeded parts.

"Profitability feature has been tuned up within the last month. New buyer would still inherit some scrapes, dings, and Stephen Kings, but overall still usable. Will take $5 OBO."

At publishing time, the listing was updated with a price increase from $5 to $8, with a line added to explain that the initial listing of $5 had been a "missed opportunity."

Kyle Mann was just minding his own business, when- BOOP! A wild Gender Fairy appeared!