DENVER, CO — In what experts described as a monumental gaffe for the National Football League, the crew of officials assigned to the Denver-Kansas City game completely forgot to rig the game for the Chiefs.
The officiating team, led by veteran referee Clete Blakeman, reportedly neglected to uphold its primary responsibility during the game, namely making calls intended to swing the game in favor of Kansas City, instead allowing Denver to come away with a 28-24 victory. Blakeman apologized for his team's failure following the game.
"We failed to do our jobs today," Blakeman admitted to reporters. "We understand that our most important task in these games, as everyone knows, is to make sure the Chiefs win. Instead, we inexplicably made bad calls that helped Denver win. In multiple cases, we actually made up penalties out of thin air and called them on the Chiefs. That obviously created a significant obstacle to ensuring a Kansas City victory. That's on us."
Critics pointed in particular to the officiating crew calling a false start penalty on the Chiefs' right tackle Jaylon Moore, in which the offensive lineman didn't seem to move sufficiently to draw a flag. The penalty negated what would have been the game-winning touchdown for the Chiefs, which Blakeman admitted would have been the NFL's preferred outcome.
"Yeah, in hindsight, making bad calls that hurt Kansas City was a bit counterproductive," he said. "We don't know why we did that. We don't know what we're doing most of the time, if I'm being totally honest here. What is a ‘false start,' anyway?"
At publishing time, the NFL had apologized to the Chiefs for dropping the ball and promised to do a better job of helping them win next week.
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