MADISON, WI — After suffering a stunning electoral upset, a distraught Democratic governor hopeful Francesca Hong will be forced to return home and spend time with her white son.
Hong has described the horrific effects of being that close to whiteness, stating that her son is a constant reminder of all the terrors of colonialism, Thanksgiving, and firm handshakes.
"Seeing his whiteness, all I can think about is the evil stored in his skin," Hong said. "When he was born, I didn't realize just how painful it would be to see his face. I'm lucky to have been educated enough to know how much to hate him. But now I have to go be his mom again, which is the worst fate in history."
Despite having a double digit lead in polls, Hong lost the Democratic primary to establishment candidate David Crowley and will not advance to the general election in November. Many had anticipated a Hong win would be a clear signal of the strength of the Democratic Socialist Party in the U.S. "We lost a good one out there. And now she has to be around white people," said DSA operative Jamie Gresham. "Hopefully, her son being half Asian will help her survive. Hong's political story is not yet over."
At publishing time, Hong had screamed in anguish after coming home to find an early invitation to a family Thanksgiving.
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