NASHVILLE, TN — A damning leak from the hacked emails of conservative commentator Matt Walsh has revealed that in spite of the question posed by his documentary What Is A Woman?, he has actually known what a woman was this entire time.
"Stunning, disgusting, rank hypocrisy," said transgender former journalist Brian Stelter. "We all knew Walsh wasn't who he claimed to be, but now we have proof."
Daily Wire CEO Jeremy Boreing also expressed disappointment at the news. "I dumped millions into Matt's documentary to discover the answer to this question, and it turned out he knew the answer this whole time. I feel betrayed," he said. "On top of that, I also found out he's still subscribed to Harry's Razors. I feel like I don't even know him."
Authorities say they are still searching for the alleged hacker, and are warning people not to share the leaked emails, as they could radicalize whoever reads them against gender ideology.
At publishing time, things had gotten worse for Walsh after someone posted the entirety of his Cowboy Bebop fanfic online.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
