DALLAS, TX — The Dallas Cowboys organization has officially moved to invoke the 25th amendment in order to remove owner Jerry Jones from power.
Sources within the organization felt that the body of evidence showing Jones to be mentally incapacitated had reached undeniable levels.
"It's about time," said long-suffering Cowboys fan Harold Martindale. "We loved Jerry, but the man is clearly no longer capable of coherent thought. As he has proven in so, so many ways, he is no longer capable of serving as the owner of the Dallas Cowboys. This is precisely why the 25th amendment exists in this great country."
According to witnesses, tensions ran high as Cowboys executives broke the news to Jones. "We'd say this was a tough decision, but honestly that would be a lie," said manager of player operations Joe Stanton. "All the executives, players, cheerleaders, and every single fan on planet earth is in agreement. We're sorry, Jerry. Honestly, that's not true either, we're pretty stoked."
At publishing time, Cowboys executives had admitted that Jones had been incapacitated for twenty years, they'd just been willing to overlook it because of the Jimmy Johnson era.
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