WASHINGTON, D.C. - After the conservative-leaning Supreme Court this week upheld another unconstitutional law passed by Democrats, conservatives praised their justices for doing such a great job of conserving all the terrible ideas Dems have had over the past few decades.

"Obamacare has been conserved -- this is yet another victory for conservatism," said one conservative commentator, Dave France. "A lot of crazy far-right Republicans are saying this is a loss, but it's actually a victory. We must uphold the norms introduced by Democrats in the last few years -- ideas that we would have considered to be insane just a couple of decades ago. They are now our country's new normal, and we must conserve them."

"This is a big win for conservatives!" he added. He continued on to warn SCOTUS against overturning other bad Democrat ideas like Roe v. Wade and allowing Big Tech to team up with big government to censor anyone they want with impunity, since these are "dearly held American values we've developed in the last few years." "Also, Trump would support overturning these things, so we must oppose."

At publishing time, Biden had signed into law a proposal to send all Republicans to labor camps, and conservatives were saying they are looking forward to their conservative Supreme Court conserving this idea as well.