MOBILE, AL—After receiving several complaints regarding the accuracy of the “All are welcome” message on the sign in front of the church, local pastor Rick Pinkerton finally tacked on an additional disclaimer listing multiple exceptions to Hartford Ave Baptist Church’s welcome policy.
The sign now reads, “All are welcome, except sinners, tobacco chewers, tattooed people, democrats, homosexuals, smokers, drinkers, dancers, etc,” and, continuing on the other side, “hippies, hipsters, vegans, secular TV watchers, and Methodists,” sources confirmed.
“We just wanted to make sure we were advertising what our church is all about accurately,” Pastor Pinkerton said. “Now, the community will know exactly which groups of people are allowed to come hear God’s gracious offer of redemption in the gospel, and which ones we’d rather not get our hands dirty offering God’s grace to.”
“I’m really hoping the clarification leads to a much more homogeneous group of people gathering to worship the Lord this Sunday,” he added.