SAN ANGELO, TX — During a recent prayer group meeting at New Covenant Church, local man Steve Farmer expressed longing for the good old days when all the obscene smut out in the world was heterosexual.
For Christians, especially Christian men, a lot of emphasis is placed on guarding one's eyes and heart against obscene images and other smut. But, according to Farmer, the smut at least used to not be so gay.
"The world is already bad enough without being so gay," Farmer reportedly lamented. "I miss the good old days when all I had to worry about was graphic heterosexual imagery."
According to sources, several men nodded in agreement that the world had definitely gotten way too gay. A few women in the group, however, thought this was an inappropriate time and place to bring up such matters.
"I just want to pray for my Aunt Janice," Sheila Keel said, trying to change the subject. "She's not gay. She just has the gout."
According to smut experts, it used to be that a man could walk down the street and not see anything gay. "Everything used to be strictly heterosexual, but now even the adult bookstores have a homosexual section," said Dr. Evan Jacobs, a professor of smut at Harvard. "It's disgusting."
At publishing time, Farmer fell into sin while reminiscing fondly about how inappropriate old Carl's Jr. commercials used to be.
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