Carman Passes Away After Lifelong Addiction To Jesus
Celebs · Feb 17, 2021 ·

LAS VEGAS, NV - Famed Christian pop legend and rapper Carman Licciardello has passed away after a lifelong Addiction To Jesus. Doctors said that the effects of the addiction were Comin' On Strong before his final moments when family members say his last words were, "Satan, Bite The Dust." 

Doctors hooked Carman up to an IV. "This Blood's For You," a doctor said. "Man Are You For Real?" one nurse replied. 

"We did some tests on This Blood. Eventually, the addiction took over and he succumbed to a Righteous Invasion of Truth," said the doctor on the scene. "He was also suffering from Post Lamb Jam." Carman was informed he should Prepare To Die. Carman said he was ready to take that Step Of Faith. Moments later, Sling-Bang-Boom, Carman passed away. 

The funeral will be held Saturday, but Sunday's On the Way.

At a pearly gates press conference, late Christian musician Keith Green announced, "We're excited to welcome home The Champion."

Babylon Bee subscriber The Real Teej contributed to this report. If you want to pitch your own headline ideas to our staff, click here to check out all of our membership options!


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