U.S. - After defeating Canada at the only thing it was supposedly good at, the entire territory of Canada has been officially declared an American province.
"And to be clear, you're just a province. Being a state is for winners," announced President Trump. "We took you over and all we lost were a few teeth. This is is so embarrassing for you."
At publishing time, Canada had admitted defeat and euthanized the national hockey team.
Protect yourself from the modern day gestapo!