NEW YORK, NY — A portion of downtown New York was closed on Friday after the "C" from the now famous "COEXIST" bumper sticker reportedly ran over the other letters with a U-Haul truck.
The letters "O", "E", "I", "S", and "T" were rushed to Lennox Hill Hospital where they remain in critical condition. The "X" was sadly pronounced dead at the scene.
"This giant 'C' just came out of nowhere and and plowed into them with a truck," said one witness. "It was absolute chaos. I don't know what that ‘C' has against them. I thought they all worked together for peace!"
The "C" reportedly entered the street from the east before before coming upon its fellow letters near an intersection where they were watching a live jazz performance of the band Tin Pan. Unfortunately, all members of the band were killed in the ensuing chaos.
Authorities confirmed that after the "C" ran over "O", "E", "X", "I", "S" and "T" that it lost control of the vehicle and smashed into a nearby tree. It proceeded to abandon the vehicle and flee on foot.
"You're going away for a long time, 'C'!" Officer Jacob Tremblay was heard saying as he tackled the wayward letter to the ground.
At publishing time, the "C" was released without bail after Mayor Zoran Mamdani put in a good word for it.
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