REHOBOTH BEACH, DE — Biden responded "No comment" to a reporter's question about the destructive, deadly Maui fires as he was leaving his much-needed vacation in Delaware over the weekend.
While many condemned the non-response as insensitive and callous, a rising chorus of voices is praising the president's non-comment comment as "the smartest, most coherent thing he's said during his presidency."
"Short, simple, to the point - and we knew exactly what he was talking about," said one Fox News reporter. "That's more than we can say for most of his statements."
"And not a single word about Corn Pop."
For their part, Hawaiians say they are grateful that the president didn't have any comment, as they fear how terrible his comment on the fires would have been. "Yeah, it's probably just best if he doesn't say anything," said one Maui resident whose house had burned down. "No comment isn't the greatest comment, but it's better than whatever Biden would have commented, probably."
"I mean, have you heard his comments?"
At publishing time, Biden had ruined his non-comment comment by claiming that his son Beau had died in the Maui fires.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
