WASHINGTON, D.C. - "Can't Do Much About That!" is President Biden's official slogan for his upcoming 2024 re-election campaign. The Biden administration unveiled the slogan this morning and noted that it is a direct quote from the president himself, intended to capture Biden's mysterious folksy charm and no-nonsense attitude.
Deputy Chief of Staff Jen Blackwoman said, "We want Americans to see the president as a kindly old man who can barely tie his shoes. Our 'Can't Do Much About That' slogan is designed to remind everyone that Biden is not responsible for anything bad happening and that he has no control whatsoever of the state of the union."
"We feel voters will really respond to this idea that they can't blame him for anything."
Sources close to the president confirmed the slogan serves a dual purpose. His handlers can't get him to remember anything so they picked a phrase he says a lot anyway.
When asked if the slogan was an error in judgment because it makes people think he has no power, the President reportedly answered, "Can't do much about that!"
Biden's 2024 campaign hasn't officially kicked off the ground just yet but should kick into high gear as soon as Republicans just give up and make Trump their nominee again.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
