Rejected Headlines Part II
· Premium · May 23, 2023 ·

As a loyal subscriber to the Bee, you get to peek behind the scenes and see headlines we deemed unfit for public consumption! We hope this serves to keep our staff writers humble as everyone learns that maybe they aren't all that talented after all. Sad!

Here are just a few pitches that didn't get published:

  • Man Gets Mom Beautiful Phone Call For Mother's Day
  • Biden Hoping America Will Confuse His Approval Rating With His Age
  • Man Buys Pickleball Racket To Finally Get In On The Fun And Oh No! The Fad Is Over
  • Disney Issues Recall For All Bluey Episodes As They Forgot To Put In The Gay Stuff
  • Bible Scholars Believe Jesus's Most Astonishing Miracle Was Fixing McFlurry Machine At Bethlehem McDonalds
  • Overwhelming Evidence Of Biden Family Bribery Scheme Results In Arrest Of George Santos
  • After 20 Years, Worship Leader Finally Learns Bass Player's Name
  • Experts Predict Within 12 Years Babylon Bee Will Run Out Of Bud Light Jokes
  • Star Wars Scientists Discover Billionth Planet In A Row That Has Breathable Atmosphere And Exact Same Gravity
  • Man Behind On All His Work Deadlines Picks Up Game With 500 Hours Of Content
  • Father Of Three Excited To Finally Get Around To Playing Ocarina Of Time
  • Man Convinced To Purchase $100,000 Car After Seeing Wacky Inflatable Tube Man
  • Man Swears Off Watching His Stupid Terrible Baseball Team Until Tomorrow At 5:10 PM

What do you think? Did we miss any gold here? Let us know in the comments!


There are 108 comments on this article.

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.