Gone Woke: New Jurassic Park Movie Has A Woman In It

Media · Jul 9, 2025 · BabylonBee.com
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U.S. — In just the latest example of the woke virus takeover, the newest installment of the Jurassic Park franchise will reportedly have a woman in it.

Despite the literal term for someone who appears in movies being "actor", movie executives chose to put a female in a movie as the push to force progressivism on audiences continues.

"Wokeness claims another victim," said commentator Glenn Beck. "The once proud Jurassic Park franchise, long known for killing off the black male characters quickly, has now stooped so low as to put a female on the screen. Everything is so realistic with the dinosaurs and then - bam, there's this woman on the screen. It's preposterous."

Audiences have come away disgusted, stating that putting a woman in a movie for inclusion purposes was insulting. "They want to make you believe that a woman could fight a dinosaur, which is insane," said moviegoer John Marks. "Everyone knows only a man can fistfight a velociraptor. The suspension of belief they're asking of you is ridiculous. Wokeness kills everything it touches."

At publishing time, movie executives had sought to reassure audiences that they spent more money on the CGI velociraptors than what they paid the woman actor.


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