NORTH HAVEN, CT — A local member of Gen Z reportedly suffered from a major panic attack on Thursday after becoming worried that he may have nailed his job interview.
According to sources, Aiden Miles, 20, applied for a job at a local Chick-fil-A at the urging of his parents. But if he were hired, he'd have to "do things" and "talk to people," which he described as "totally cringe."
Miles also noted that a job would significantly cut into his time watching streams of people playing video games he can't afford to buy — a fate he has described as "mid."
"The manager really liked me, and now I'm scared they'll offer me the job," Miles said. "I wish I was dead."
Miles's biggest mistake, according to people familiar with the interview, was actually showing up. "He was here on time and well dressed, and very polite throughout," Manager Ben Morris said, describing his encounter with the Zoomer. "I think he's a great candidate."
Though his parents received the brunt of the blame from their son for his current anxious state, Miles claimed that the Chick-fil-A manager also bore much of the responsibility. "The fact he liked me is really sus," Miles explained. "Major red flag. Some toxic ick here, for sure. No cap."
At publishing time, sources confirmed that Miles had reluctantly become a reliable employee and hard worker, alienating him from all his friends.
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