U.S. — According to sources, a plane carrying emergency supplies and $10 Billion in disaster relief flew over the Hawaiian island of Maui on its way to Ukraine.
Island residents were at first delighted to see the disaster relief plane on the horizon until they saw it adjust its course to avoid the heavy smoke. "Where are you going?! Help us!" said a mother of four who had become homeless overnight when the fires took her home.
Upon seeing the chaos below, the aircraft's pilot reportedly muttered to himself. "Hmm, I wonder why we aren't going there. Oh well! Ukraine, here we come!"
The crew aboard the disaster relief plane reportedly took exciting photos of the Hawaiian destruction that they agree will make for a great addition to their disaster scrapbook.
At publishing time, the pilot had been awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom for expertly navigating the plane around the pillar of smoke that rose up from the smoldering ruins of Maui like a furnace, saving the aircraft from being covered in soot.
It's a serious medical emergency: you're minding your own business when you hear an opinion you slightly disagree with.