XUANHUA — One local family's search for a new place of worship continued last weekend, as a couple declined to attend a Chinese underground church over its lack of children's programming.
The couple had been eager to check out a nearby branch of an underground church for some time, but were left deeply disappointed upon finding out that the church came up short in its children's ministry.
"We were really hoping for a more robust kids' church," said the father. "It seemed like a good place, despite all the secrecy, but it just didn't check all the boxes when it came to exciting and engaging activities for our children. We get that it's an underground church and everything, but come on… where are the bounce houses and puppet shows?"
When reached for comment, the anonymous pastor of the underground church congregation explained the situation. "I guess we're mostly focused on preaching the Gospel and trying not to be killed," he said. "We'd love to have the ability to build out our children's ministry with all the bells and whistles, but it's difficult to do that when the full power of the Chinese Communist Party is trying to hunt you down and persecute you. Right now, the best we can do is a few bootleg VeggieTales DVDs that are dubbed over in Portuguese."
At publishing time, the couple had reportedly moved on to visit other Chinese underground churches in hopes of finding one that held regular marriage retreats.
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