The time has finally come. After some intense, heated deliberation over virgin martinis at the Bee retreat, we finally came to an agreement that Conservative Proff was winning the "First!" badge at an unsustainable, unacceptable rate. We had no choice, really. The man had to be stopped. So we've decided to increase the competition, open the floodgates, and allow ALL subscribers to comment on our articles.

Please don't abuse this opportunity. If the new participants flood our comments section with terrible jokes or can't handle the awesomeness that is the Comment Generator, we will be forced to reverse course and strip their privileges.