LOS ANGELES, CA — Officials in California hailed the historic number of ballots cast in the state's primaries, proudly reporting voter turnout of 250%.
Governor Gavin Newsom praised California citizens for their remarkable civic engagement, stating that 250% voter turnout was far beyond what anyone thought possible.
"They said 250% turnout couldn't be done, that it was literally impossible. We proved them wrong," said Newsom. "I am incredibly honored to have overseen the counting of more ballots than anyone thought was conceivable. There are some precincts that saw up to 500% turnout, which is so remarkable. This sort of election shows the true heart of the state of California."
Democratic Party strategists were buoyed by the results, believing it could be a harbinger of voter turnout come November. "To reach 250% turnout in the primary election, we're really pleased," said operative Marcus Bundy. "That means our system is in place and working exactly like it's supposed to. The turnout number could go much, much higher in the general election. We like where we're at."
At publishing time, election officials had revised the turnout figure upward to 312 percent after discovering several additional boxes of votes that had accidentally been counted only twice.
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