WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Joe Biden has taken a tough stance against Cuban refugees. While Biden usually welcomes anyone - especially illegal immigrants - to America, the Cubans are different, because when they come here they might commit malicious acts, such as voting Republican. Thus Biden is trying to dissuade Cubans from coming here by telling them that if they're fleeing to America to seek freedom, America is actually getting rid of that.

"I'm sorry, but we're junking that right-wing, QAnon liberty malarkey," Biden said in a statement aimed at Cuba. "If you want that, look elsewhere. We found that freedom got in the way of responding to COVID - which we're pretty certain is never, ever going away - and all of our economic plans, so it's on its way out, Jack."

Biden also pointed out that it is dumb to flee the Marxism in Cuba because we're trying to get more Marxism here. "All the young people on my staff, they can't get enough of the Marxism," Biden said. "So if you don't like that, it's just a terrible idea to come over here. Maybe instead try... I dunno... is Guam a country?"

Biden did extend an invite to any refugees, though, who are fleeing their countries because they don't provide enough education about Critical Race Theory.