Biden Deploys Troops To Border To Stop Texas From Securing Border
U.S. · Sep 29, 2023 · BabylonBee.com

EL PASO, TX — With the ongoing migrant crisis along the southern border of the United States, President Joe Biden has taken decisive action and announced he is deploying U.S. military personnel to the border to stop the state of Texas from securing the border.

"It's time someone finally did something about this," Biden said. "For far too long, Texas has been causing tremendous harm to the United States. No more! As Commander-In-Chief, I am sending our military to the border immediately to make sure Texas stops securing the border. With this action, it is my hope that…that all of the…millions…that all of the…that the border will be completely…you know…where am I here? Knock it off, Texas!"

Texas leaders have been using a wide range of tactics in a desperate attempt to secure the border and stem the continual flood of illegal migrants crossing the border from Mexico. After a series of warnings from the Biden administration, it seems the federal government has lost its patience. "It's time for Texas to stand down," said White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre. "Their efforts to secure the border are a clear violation of our violation of immigration law. Texas must stop these attempts to make the country safer. If they don't take immediate steps to put the American people in danger, we will."

At publishing time, in addition to the U.S. military being deployed to the border, President Biden also announced plans to build a wall around Texas to keep migrants from getting out.


Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.

Watch Santa's retirement announcement

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now