U.S. — Experts revealed that an estimated 12 million new Charlie Kirks had been created overnight following the murder of the conservative echelon earlier this week. The army of Charlie Kirks was said to be uniformly committed to continuing the original Kirk's message and mission of hope and courage.
"I've never seen anything like it," sociologist Brandon Meeks told reporters. "Over 12 million new Charlie Kirks sprang up practically overnight. They're carrying Kirk's message all over the place. I saw twenty of them with my own eyes, speaking plain truths and affirming the mission of Jesus Christ boldly to all corners of the earth. It's pretty remarkable."
Witnesses said that the vast legion of Charlie Kirks looked like regular people but were identifiable by their actions and the way they unapologetically defended truth, even in the face of angry opposition. Sources said the individuals all affirmed their faith in Christ and were last seen going about making a positive difference in the world.
"We're just normal people, but we're all Charlie Kirk," said one new Charlie Kirk. "I've committed myself to carrying on his mission everywhere I go. He stood for truth, civility, honesty, and faith, and I will too. I'm Charlie Kirk. You are, too."
At publishing time, Turning Point USA announced that Charlie Kirk's message could never be killed and that the newly formed army of Charlies was already doing fantastic work moving its mission forward.
Tony asks questions about everything in his life. Is he a crazy conspiracy theorist?
