LAKE CHARLES, LA—A Southern Baptist church was hit with a severe case of food poisoning Sunday afternoon after a casserole was carelessly brought into a potluck after the official prayer of blessing over the food, sources confirmed Tuesday.
According to witnesses, new church member Jane Bender had run to the store after service to get plates and cups, and returned just moments after the pastor spoke words of blessing over the food. Apparently not realizing the danger she was exposing everyone to, Bender slipped her cheesy chicken dish onto the end of the food table, her unblessed food now indistinguishable from the blessed dishes.
As church members enjoyed fellowshipping with one another, little did they know the unholy chicken casserole was performing its sinister work in their bowels.
By the time someone realized what was going on, it was too late, and a number of church members were reportedly rushed to the hospital in church buses and 15-passenger vans.
“I’m deeply sorry,” Bender told reporters. “I should have known never to serve food that had not been blessed to the consumers’ bodies. I won’t make that mistake again.”