Mark Zuckerberg Promises To Do Better At Hiding Facebook’s Data Mining Activities

MENLO PARK, CA—Finally emerging after days of silence following the revelation that millions of Facebook accounts had their data underhandedly exploited for political purposes, CEO Mark Zuckerberg vowed to do better at hiding such shady activities in the future.

Speaking in an interview with CNN, the Facebook chief sincerely apologized for getting caught, and committed to be much more clandestine in future misuse of users’ sensitive information.

“If we can’t even hide a simple breach of 50 million Facebook users’ data, we don’t deserve your trust,” he said at the presser. “We can, we must, and we will do better at making sure the acquisition and sale of your personal data remains shrouded in mystery.”

At publishing time, Zuckerberg had further committed to Facebook shareholders that he would ensure data would be sold for much greater profit, all without the end users’ knowledge.