Local Man Receives Rare Spiritual Gift Of Critical Emailing

KANSAS CITY, MO—While every Christian has a unique blend of God-given, supernatural gifts, some believers are able to discern what their gifting is much more quickly than others. Such is the case with local man Nathan Byers, a recent convert who immediately discovered that he has an uncanny, “Spirit-breathed” ability to offer scathing critical rebukes of others via email, sources confirmed Wednesday.

Byers’ gifting was reportedly confirmed by his local church Sunday afternoon, as he fired off a holy email blast scolding the pastor for everything from the song selection, which was “too modern,” to the sermon, which was “too stuffy.”

“Byers is a real blessing to our church,” his pastor told reporters. “It’s so encouraging to see a young man with a real passion for using his spiritual gift to really berate other people from a distance via electronic communication, for any minor disagreement or difference.”

The pastor also reported that Byers’ gift was utilized no less than fifteen times throughout the remainder of the week, as the Lord called to mind other extremely minor issues he needed to crusade against via sacred digital missives.

“I’m not looking for any recognition or fame,” Byers said via email. “I’m just humbly using the gift that the Spirit graciously gave me to let others know that my way of doing things is best.”