Instagram Introduces New ‘Spiritual’ Filter

MENLO PARK, CA—An exciting new Instagram filter will transform your regular old pictures taken with the social media app into a picturesque example of just how spiritual you are, Instagram representatives confirmed Monday.

The new ‘Spiritual’ filter, available in today’s Instagram update, will replace whatever secular book you are reading with a well-worn copy of the Holy Bible, enhanced with a darkened, moody look to show just how serious you are about God. The app will also digitally add an artisan coffee or chai tea to go with the study Bible superimposed over your secular reading.

“This exciting new filter redeems any heathen activity to the glory of God,” an Instagram rep said. “Now you don’t need to feel guilty when you just want to read a fantasy book, sci-fi novel, James Patterson novel, or Batman comic—your friends won’t have any idea.”

“You’ll still get to enjoy things, but now you won’t miss out on that righteous street cred with your Christian buddies.”

If the Spiritual filter is used on a group of friends, the app will distort the image to make it look as though the subjects are studying the Bible or praying together, replacing any non-redeemed activities like playing board games, watching a sports game, or just hanging out enjoying creation, the rep also confirmed.