Facebook Adds New ‘I’d Rather Die’ Response To Event Invitations

MENLO PARK, CA—In a long-awaited update, Facebook has introduced the ability to respond to event invitations with “I’d rather die,” in addition to the previous buttons that simply allowed users to respond with “Interested,” “Going,” or “Ignore” on public events and “Going,” “Maybe,” “Can’t go” on private events.

The new button will clearly indicate to the event creator and other guests that you would rather drop dead than attend their social function.

“Previously, if you got invited to yet another board game night, graduation party, or quinceañera, the strongest denial you could give was a ‘No,’ or an ‘Ignore,'” a Facebook representative said Friday. “Now, you can show your true feelings, by telling your friends, family, and distant acquaintances that you would rather keel over on the spot than go to their Scentsy party, neighborhood barbecue, or open-mic performance. It’s about authenticity.”

According to the Facebook rep, if the button proves to be popular, other responses such as “I Would Rather Gouge My Eyes Out With A Dull Spoon” and “LOL, Not In A Million Years” will be made available in the coming weeks.