Church’s Vision Stuck At Bottom Of Creek After Pastor Casts Too Close To Downed Tree

OAK HILL, WV—Filled with anxiety at the possible consequences of his error, local pastor J. R. Wright quietly and urgently admitted to sources Tuesday that he got First Baptist Church’s vision stuck at the bottom of Arbuckle Creek after casting it too close to a downed tree.

“I tried to find it all morning—I just came back to the church for a few so people didn’t start wondering where I was,” a panicked Wright whispered to a coworker, who requested anonymity due to the serious nature of the event.

“I was just casting vision like normal and I saw a great spot by a downed tree, so I flipped it over there and got hung up, and the line snapped, and—oh man, what if it’s lost? What if it’s gone and we have no vision?” he cried in a hushed tone, before adding that the people of FBC Oak Hill would perish if he couldn’t recover the vision, just like the Scripture says, and it would be all his fault.

At publishing time, Wright had found a snorkeling mask in the youth room and was headed back to the creek to continue his search, after taking his personal vision target out of his pocket and placing it in his desk drawer for safekeeping.