U.S.—According to reports flooding in from around the country, believers everywhere stopped what they were doing Tuesday and began begging God to prevent the “male romper” craze from catching on among their congregations’ worship leaders.
“We’ve persevered through the skinny jeans, Lord, but this may be more than we can bear,” one Tennessee man said in an emergency prayer meeting held at his local Baptist church after he found out about the hugely successful Kickstarter launch of the “RompHim.”
“Maranatha, Lord Jesus, Maranatha!”
“Strike the romper from among your sons, Lord. Save us, O God, save us now!” another responded as loud wails erupted throughout the room and one man rent his polo shirt and sprinkled dust and ashes over his head.
Christians nationwide collectively apologized to the Lord for complaining about V-necks and unnecessary scarves in years past, and skinny jeans in the modern day, and told God they would do “absolutely anything” if He would just “take this cup from us,” reports confirmed.